Tags
advertising, media, public relations, putin, russia, ukraine
Full-time | mid-senior level
Actively recruiting
The Russian Federation is adding to its PR team! As the world’s largest country by land mass, with aggressive plans for future expansion, our demands for effective, timely communications have never been greater, and we need more public relations talent.
In short, we demand a PR strategist who can hit the ground running. Someone who is a smart, motivated, ambitious professional who loves turning even the most grievous news into an opportunity to win hearts and minds for the Motherland. A natural storyteller who can spin compelling narratives that, while not always fact-based, can inspire, motivate and even comfort the Russian people. A wordsmith and innovator who, when necessary, can find a convenient scapegoat on whom to blame all of the nation’s economic and social problems.
The Public Relations Strategist must be a tireless cheerleader for the Russian Federation brand, while also driving strategy to deliver positive results across a wide range of traditional and social media. This job requires raw determination and an iron will. The Strategist must be able to get his or her hands dirty on various campaigns, must work after-hours and on weekends, and must expect to be challenged by superiors who will sometimes kick and scream or make threats to the PR Strategist’s family when things are not going well for Russia.
Your qualifications must include:
- Between five and 10 years of experience in communications and public relations for a mid-sized to large country – preferably a totalitarian regime.
- Minimum of a Bachelor’s degree in journalism, communications, psychological warfare, social engineering or a related field.
- The ability to set and exceed KPIs and metrics, and then have those KPIs and metrics ripped apart and flung in your face because a rival country tweeted a video of a rocket hitting an apartment building.
- A keen understanding of all forms of social media, particularly TikTok.
- A deep-seated anger and distrust toward the West.
- Strong written and verbal communication skills, and a not-so-strong moral compass.
- The ability to use a bolt-action rifle, endure harsh winters, and subsist on delicious Russian cabbage soup for months at a time.
- An openness to close interaction with supervisors and to having one’s ideas challenged, questioned, ignored, crushed or shat upon.
- A sense of fun and a love of collaboration with one’s comrades.
What we can offer:
- A chance to tour and experience the world — or at least Belarus and North Korea.
- Spacious Kremlin office with bird’s eye view of Red Square that was once occupied by Vyacheslav Molotov.
- An almost certain guarantee to not be targeted in the next Purge.
- Monday morning judo competitions, bare-chested bear wrestling and other extreme feats of daring, administered by the President himself.
- Casual Fridays and ping-pong tournaments.
- An opportunity to take part in the Russian Federation’s Special Military Operation to free the Ukrainian people from Nazification, no matter how much they resist.
- Admission-free visits to Lenin’s Tomb.
- Unlimited PTO.
Not interested in this position? Appalled by the idea of working under Vladimir Putin? Click here to make a real difference in helping victims of the war on Ukraine.