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Some television commercials are so ridiculous, it’s impossible to parody them because they do such an effective job of parodying themselves. Such is the case with this commercial for AndroGel, a new drug for low testosterone, or “Low T,” as the hip middle-aged guy in the ad calls it. You can find the commercial here on the drug company’s website.

If you invested two minutes of your life into watching this advertisement, you’ll notice that much of its running time is dedicated to disclaimers about all the strange and/or horrible things the drug might do to you, all on the off-chance that it will improve your performance in the bedroom. Here are all the disclaimers, courtesy of the handy transcript that the drug company provides:

Women and children should avoid contact with application sites. Discontinue AndroGel and call your doctor if you see unexpected signs of early puberty in a child, or signs in a woman, which may include changes in body hair or a large increase in acne, possibly due to accidental exposure…

Women and children should avoid contact with application sites. Men with breast cancer or who have or might have prostate cancer, and women who are, or may become pregnant or are breastfeeding, should not use AndroGel. Serious side effects include worsening of an enlarged prostate, possible increased risk of prostate cancer, lower sperm count, swelling of ankles, feet, or body, enlarged or painful breasts, problems breathing during sleep, and blood clots in the legs. Tell your doctor about your medical conditions and medications, especially insulin, corticosteroids, or medicines to decrease blood clotting.

Yes. You should be very worried.

Yes. You should be very worried.

It’s the mentioning of “blood clots,” and “possible increased risk of prostate cancer” that really grab my attention, much more than the cozy images of the middle-aged guy sporting around in his Mustang convertible and lighting a Chinese lantern with his wife. “Just how did this drug receive FDA approval?” and “How many guys out there actually need this?” are two thoughts that run through my mind when watching this. Apparently a lot of guys need it, as the number of prescriptions for “Low T” drugs have tripled in the past decade or so.

Well, I guess you have to give the makers of AndroGel credit for taking a “warts and all” approach to advertising – the legally prudent thing to do. But I know I won’t be rolling the dice in the hopes of raising my testosterone number anytime soon.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go out and light a Chinese lantern with my wife.

Image courtesy of CaryCitizen.com.